Trauma Breakthrough Coaching
Overt and hidden trauma keeps people stuck.
To endure the overwhelming physical and emotional impact of trauma, survivors naturally take on self-protective patterns of relating to those around them. These patterns are crucial for survival when they’re first learned, so they become very resistant to change. Later in life these patterns are often no longer needed and frequently get in the way. If you have trauma in your background then you may find yourself asking questions like these:
- It seems to me that my childhood trauma is affecting my relationship and I don’t really understand it or know what to do about it. How can I overcome the impact this has on my relationships?
- How can I get over my feelings of distrust in others?
- I have a tendency to be overly defensive and to push people away, even when I want to be close. Can I ever learn to do that differently?
- I often “lose” myself in relationship. I feel compelled to please my partner. Is there any way to honor my own needs and still stay connected?
- Sometimes I get panicky and I don’t even know why. I feel scared and unsafe in ways that I can’t explain, or in ways that don’t make sense, or in ways that totally make sense given my past but don’t make any sense at all given what’s happening now. Why can’t I just drop this?
- I’ll only ever let people get so close. What other people call intimacy feels suffocating to me.
- I don’t feel a strong connection to my sexuality. I seem to have lost my libido… or maybe I never had it in the first place.
- I feel compulsive about sex. I find myself acting out in ways that I feel guilty about and ashamed of.
- My partner(s) complain that I get too close, too fast. They think I’m needy, when all I really want is to connect.
- What do I need to learn and how do I need to grow in order to create and sustain a quality love relationship?
If more than 2 or 3 of these rang true for you, then I can help. When I work with trauma survivors, they often thank me for things like this:
- Now I feel like I can move forward in my own life I’m not stuck anymore.
- I feel lighter and instead of just coping I’m thriving.
- I’m letting go of the shame that I’ve carried my whole lifetime
- I have more compassion for myself and others
- I feel more alive
- Now I know that whatever happens, I can take care of myself and keep myself safe without having to push people away.
- I’ve learned to say no without fear or embarrassment or shame.
- I don’t get nearly as angry anymore I can be more of an observer
- My boundaries are more clear. It’s easier for me to let my partner know where I stand.
If your partner is a survivor of childhood trauma, you may not know how to support them and still take care of yourself. Through a process I use called the “Breakthrough Session” (link to breakthrough session page from Goddess) my clients begin the “releasing” of the emotions of the trauma that have held them back.
Let’s start with a simple conversation and let’s see if I can assist you or your loved one in Breaking Free from the past once and for all.
CONTACT ME AT Info@Totabreakthroughconnections.com
What is Trauma?
Trauma occurs when events overwhelm a person’s capacity to cope with them. Since children have a more limited capacity than adults, even children who grow up in loving homes may experience some form of trauma. Trauma can include:
- childhood physical, sexual, or emotional abuse
- absence or loss of minimal care and nurturing (such as in the death or serious disability of a parent)
- childhood loss of a sibling
- loss of home (foreclosure, earthquake, hurricane, etc.)
- substance abuse in the family
- any loss that negatively impacts the child’s sense of safety and well-being over time
Physical, sexual, and emotional abuse is a deep, deep betrayal of trust. This is true at any time of life and especially so when it occurs in childhood. Other events that pose a threat to safety, well-being, and connection can also impact the psychobiology as trauma. Although coping mechenisms to trauma grow out of the unconsicious minds capacity for safety and survival, over time these behavioral strategies can outgrow their usefulness. But because they protected our safety and security, they’re very resistant to change. If you have trauma in your background and you’re experiencing trouble in your relationships, call me. I can help. With the Breakthrough Session that includes the Mental Emotional Release Technique the emotions surrounding the traumatic event can be released in a matter of a day instead of years of “talk therapy”. This is a holistic approach that works with the unconscious mind to “release” like a string of pearls all the emotions that hold you back from moving forward. (link to Breakthrough Session Page)
Signs and Symptoms of Trauma
If you think you may have trauma in your background, these are some important signs to watch for:
- Persistent trouble sleeping
- hypervigilance – always on alert for danger
- being easily startled
- numbing out or feeling dead, disinterested, and disengaged
- spacing out, dissociating, escaping in your imagination, or “going away”
- failing to take care of yourself persistent feelings of shame; a desire to hide or be invisible